Celebrating One (Difficult) Year of Breastfeeding
Today marks my last day breastfeeding David, and with it comes a huge sense of accomplishment, but more so relief. While I primarily nursed David for the first 3 months, a series of other obstacles led me to exclusively pump for these past nine. Our journey was full of hurdles and came with no shortage of emotion and frustration. Throughout it all, I’ve learned a lot. I wanted to share some tips I will take with me if we are lucky enough to add another baby to our family:
1) If you’re struggling with feeding, seek the support of a team (your pediatrician, lactation consultant, and specialists) if you’re not seeing the results you are hoping for. In healthcare, many of us have become overly specialized which can sometimes make it challenging to see the bigger picture. While there was no question David had both a tongue and lip tie, the majority of his feeding struggles were not due to poor latch but instead allergy. I wish we had gone back to our pediatrician sooner and involved a gastroenterologist/allergist rather than solely focusing on the mechanics of breastfeeding.
2) Breastfeeding doesn’t have to be all or nothing. I went into it with a goal of not using any formula. It’s truly unfortunate that there is so much stigma around formula use, as I felt it. The small amount of elemental formula we could get David to take helped to bridge my supply when I worked to get it back up.
3) Have a Haaka and Epsom salts on hand (I even brought them on vacation). I never found my Haaka was worth it to collect milk, but it has been essential on multiple occasions to do an Epsom salt soak to clear clogged ducts (I’ve had more than 10).
If you choose to pump:
(I am a Registered Dietitian, not a lactation expert; I am simply sharing what worked well for me)
4) Exclusive pumping is breastfeeding without nursing. I felt sad when David stopped nursing, but I continually reminded myself that he was still getting the nutritional and immunological benefits of breastmilk.
5) If you are going to be pumping more than just on occasion, invest in silicone flanges that fit properly. I love the Lacteck baby motion flanges and I was able to get them in the correct size. In fact, my body has gotten so used to them that I get a quarter of the output with the hard flanges that came with my pump. They’ll fit with most Medela parts but if you have a Spectra you’ll need a set of these adapters.
6) If you notice your output is less with no other explanation, change your duckbill valves/membranes. You can also use duckbill valves in place of medela membranes, which many find easier.
7) Use hands on pumping. As I got further on our journey, I found this was essential to my output.
8) Save yourself some time by using the fridge hack and getting another set of parts (flanges, backflow protectors, membranes/valves) and multiple bottles (spectra, Medela) to pump into.
If you’ve read this far, you’re probably curious why I didn’t switch to formula. David has multiple allergies which left us with one option- elemental (completely broken down) formula. Unlike most I’ve had the opportunity of trying elemental formula (thank you dietetic internship) and it has quite an offensive taste. While many babies will take to it, David did not and it was a struggle to say the least. To top it off, a can of this formula retails for almost double the cost of a standard infant formula. These factors in combination with my pediatric nutrition training and initial goal of breastfeeding for one year made the choice to continue feel like it was the only one.
Had I had the option of giving David another formula, my choice would have been much different. In fact, I admire mothers who incorporate formula because they have had the strength to see beyond the unjustified stigma society has created around it to make the best choice for their own mental health; this is most important for baby. I know first-hand how breastfeeding challenges can impact a mother. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have moments where I channeled my frustration into anger towards my husband- and, there were even moments where I even felt resentment towards my baby. It’s hard to describe it but when you’re in the thick of it, the idea of stopping feels like failure.
Aside from the hours spent pumping, the greater challenge was the dietary restrictions I had to follow due to David’s allergies. If you’re interested in learning more about breastfeeding a baby with allergies (and my tips), check out my prior post. Eating in restaurants was near impossible and I felt such guilt asking others to accommodate my dietary needs when we would get together with friends (sometimes I would even avoid socializing due to the hassle). To be honest, I’m not sure how I would have been able to do navigate it outside of COVID times.
While Motherhood is incredibly rewarding, it doesn’t come without challenges. Feeding was certainly ours. Should you be looking to optimize your nutrition postpartum or find yourself having to change your diet while breastfeeding due a diagnosed allergy in your baby, I’d love to support you.